Recently I came to the realization that mindfulness is the healer of ALL things that may come your way. Now I am sure you have heard this word so widely used by many but understood by only so few. Mastering mindfulness is a hard habit to obtain, but once you do, you will begin to feel peace. Ok, ok, now I’m not trying to sound like a yoga teacher or one of the meditation apps you’ve tried to follow, I want to give straight-up hard truth of how to obtain a mindful state.

Here’s what helps me; either surround yourself with those you feel most comfortable with or place yourself in an environment where you can get out of your head, worry less and feel the most you. This could be resting your head on your lover’s shoulder, sitting on a rock near a lake, in a garden, at a coffee shop, even on a treadmill at the gym… this is completely up to you. I found that at the beginning of practicing mindfulness I was able to do this best at night while falling asleep. Now that you’ve placed yourself in this situation it’s time to control those thoughts of yours. Trust me, this is the hardest part for me as well, but just trust me when I tell you this is the most critical part that will allow you to reach absolute peace. Let’s say your laying on your lovers chest, slowly falling asleep, yet thoughts run through your head, such as, did I set my alarm, I wonder what he or she is thinking about, omg I forgot to send that email today, oh shoot I really don’t want to workout in the morning. These thoughts aren’t getting you anywhere. In fact, any thought that does not have to do with how you feel at that very moment is useless. If you want to achieve the mindfulness you have to shut them up. So, here’s how, a thought pops in your head you want to engage it, ponder it, stress it, instead I want you to imagine you are a teacher and the class needs to remain silent because there is someone presenting, that someone is your mind. I want you as a teacher to address each of those thoughts as if you are addressing an eager child who has a million questions. Politely tell that thought “I appreciate your thoughts, but now is not the time” or “It’s quiet time, please do not interrupt.” If you imagine this so deeply you’ll find yourself eventually reaching peace within your thoughts. Those thoughts aren’t connected to your well being, they will be addressed when it is the right time. Ok now that you know how to quiet those little children in your head, it is time to listen to the speaker, your mind. How does it truly feel? I mean, what makes you feel the most grateful? What makes you feel the most fearful? What makes you feel the most aligned with yourself? Ask yourself all the things that are clouding your ability to find peace. Address your negative thoughts and then let them out (writing or speaking to others), address your challenges in life and then tell yourself “these are good challenges, because”, and then sit back and pay attention to your breath, the way your hands feel and whatever they are touching, feel it deeply.

Once you can connect your soul and body to your mind by doing these steps, you have reached mindfulness. Allow yourself to listen to the speaker, your mind, at least once a day. Eventually, that speaker will run your life and that is exactly the goal. If we all lived a more mindful life, none of us would have regrets, nobody would feel doubtful and those fears we face would be conquered.